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I recently was introduced to the concept of MIRRORING as it relates to how individuals act in relations to people they meet. One particular element that struck me was that what makes some people more successful at their relationships and interactions is that they mirror their counterpart. To elaborate further, if I know you like canasta games and shuffleboard and found out that you even go to senior homes to seek out tournaments in those areas, I would unconsciously find myself interested in those areas, talk about it, offer to go play, and perhaps express a desire to improve my own skills. By doing this, you recognizes in me things that are not only familiar to you but also become excited that things that are meaningful to you are also meaningful to me. That makes me more attractive to you than someone who says, "Who the hell plays that shit?"If I purposely sought out such information and used it with intent to deceive or lure, that would be unconscionable. But there are people that do this naturally and unwittingly. They really assume the qualities of the people they are with, with the side effect of rendering themselves more likable. I have met people like that and they are truly a sight to behold because, "gosh darn it, people like them."
I suspect that we all have some element of this in our personality unless we have Asperger's or Autism. It made me realize that I, too, fluctuate and vacillate between
the various levels of my persona. Sometimes I find myself more religious amongst the more frum or suddenly appreciate art more so than I do normally whilst hanging with an art major. In honest reflection, I don't feel that I am out to deceive anyone or myself but that there are levels of appreciation I can achieve and differing aspects of my persona that I can bring to the forefront and still be me. In the past, I actually suppressed important aspects of my personality or desires to please the person I was with. I have since recognized that I still have to be me and true to myself but still have flexibility to broaden my world.Though, I think I need to reflect on this a bit more.
