Face Lift

ADS 336x280 Here...

Come Running sent me a Daily Lift because it too follows in the theme of my mirroring posts.

Daily Lift #233
King Solomon’s Wise Formula

In the book of Proverbs (27:19), we find an amazing formula for peace. “As in water, face is to face, so too is the heart of one person to another.”

When you look at your reflection in a pond or in a mirror, you will see the exact same expression that is on your face. If you frown and scowl, you will see a frown and scowl staring right back at you. And if you smile and wave, you will see a smile and a wave. This is a natural law of physics. To frown and expect to see a smile on the image of your face in a mirror isn't a wise expectation.

King Solomon teaches us that this natural law has a counterpoint in the laws of human nature. The inner feelings you experience towards someone will be reflected back to you from the heart of that person.

See the good in other people. See them as being souls who have high aspirations even if at present they are not yet using all of their potential. See people as they will be when they are at their best. Judge people favorably. See the positive intentions of what they say and do even when it would be preferable if they chose better ways to accomplish those positive intentions.

The way to influence people to feel better towards you is to radiate unconditional love and respect towards them. When someone likes and respects you first, it's easier to reciprocate those feelings. It is a step towards greatness to be the one to create unconditional love and respect when you need to sustain this in the face of challenges. Be willing to take this step.

(from Rabbi Zelig Pliskin’s book, Harmony with Others, pp.32-3, artscroll.com)


This snippet can apply to understanding human-God relations as well. There is a famous pasuk where God says "If you leave me a day, I will leave you for two days (Im ta'azvaini yom, yo'mayim eh'ezveka)." Now that sounds rather harsh and spiteful. God is saying, "If you withdraw from me a day, HAH, I can do worse, I'll withdraw from you two-fold." I believe I heard this from R. Frand that this is an incorrect rendering of the deeper meaning behind the saying. God mirrors human behavior towards Him. If you come closer, he meets you halfway. If you withdraw in one direction, he too withdraws but in an equal and opposite, directly proportional direction.

See diagram for your basic geometry of our relationship with God. Center '0' is the point of ultimate oneness with God (obviously a theoretical point). You end up twice as far from God when you travel one unit (as he moves the same amount in the opposite direction). Your actions and attitudes directly impact on your relationship with the Divine as well as others in you life.

This reminded me of Rebbetzin Jungreis' lecture at SYAS Back to Camp Moshava weekend in 2005. She described all the sadness and heartbreak people have shared with her about their dating situation. The one thing she stressed to all of them was that they have every right to experience their own pain but what right do you have to make others experience it as well? She elaborated that you should always smile at people. If you are depressed by your situation and show it in your face, that affects MY mood. What have I done to deserve that negative aura? Obviously, it isn't easy to always show the world a happy face but it's certainly worth the effort. It may even start to affect your own mood in a positive manner.

Cue Mr. Rourke on Fantasy Island, "Smiles everybody, smiles."