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A poll of the average shopper has clearly identified the God of the Gaps as the force behind extreme sales initiatives and marketing in the fashion industry. But of course what do people know?Religious groups have claimed that the God of the Gaps is the power behind major changes in creatures over time, seen in the fossil record. Scientists call this evolution and point out that just because we don't have every fossil to show every stage along the way doesn't mean that evolution isn't happening. To the devout, the gaps are too great to fathom, too incredulous to be random and so God is inserted into these (ever narrowing) gaps. But since when does religion provide a more logical approach than science? What do these people know?
And so I have been searching for the true God of the Gaps. This God was found this morning during my 4-mile run with a good buddy. I have to say he has much more stamina than me (he claims in all areas but we have yet to set up the appropriate double-blind(folded) randomized trials). Slowly after mile 3 he was outpacing me. I called out to the God of the Gaps, praying for that burst of unearthly energy. I was struck so suddenly by the intense light (perhaps I was fainting from exhaustion or having a mystical vision or more likely an episode of temporal lobe epilepsy). It allowed me to shift into overdrive and finish at the same time as him. I realized the reason that I didn't outdo him (aside from the fact that he's better) is that the God of the Gaps can only narrow or close the gaps for the supplicant who is behind. For the one in the lead the God of the Gaps can indeed increase the gap so as to extend the lead but unless the guy behind you has a knife or has caught you with his wife, most of the time this prayer goes unrequested. So now, you too can know the one true God! I call him God of the Gasps!
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