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"Hi my name is Ryan!"
"And my name is Ty! We will be your guides on today's episode of Wilderness Walkway where you get to share our lives living on the edge...of the cliff and sanity! Look Ryan, the veils of morning hazes are parting as we speak, almost in a manner reminiscent of the fabled Red Sea parting."
"Yes, and here comes our first model. Notice his confident, Moses-like stride, as if it is his God-given right to mark this territory. And oh what a mark that would be! Look how well he is selling that outfit. Don't you feel like you just want to run out and buy one?"
"Well, Ryan. I don't think just anyone could get away with that look, it takes a strong personality, poise, confidence, and a great sense of laisse-faire to pull off that look. But my, wouldn't you just love to believe you could?"
"Indeed, Ty, I would. That outfit just screams, "Get out there into the wilderness, into the desert where our forefathers tread; out there, where time seems to stand still and the mystery of the universe is as dark as the coat he is wearing."
"God, Ryan, I wish I knew where you come up with this stuff."
"Ty, here's my shameless plug for Allie, the 'Shiksa with style.' She's my number one go-to for all that is fashion, and, by golly, isn't everything about fashion?"
"True but here this outfit is telling a story. It's the time-old story about conquering your yatzer hara (evil inclination, for all you devil wanna be's) and being prepared for anything. Just look closely at his outfit. Let's begin with the skullcap which keeps his head warm on a brisk fall day, allowing him to enjoy the rich vibrant colors of the fall foliage. It has a fine velvety surface for a pleasurable sensory experience, yet the inner layer is a synthetic design to wick away perspiration under the most extreme conditions.
"Notice his long black coat, definitely appropriate for the season and you really can never go wrong with a wide selection of black. This man has the two essential qualities you would want, style and practicality. Like his multifaceted mind, he has layers. His clothing layers allow him to add or subtract as the weather demands..."
"Er, Ty, have you ever seem him subtract any layers even in the summer?'
"Ryan, you are forgetting that temperature at elevation and in the wilderness can drop quite suddenly even in the summer. I think what you are seeing is a fully prepared wilderness wanderer. Think 40 years of wandering capability built into that outfit."
"I tell you, Ty, I've been thinking about all the great outfits we have seen so far this season here in the great outdoors but this one certainly is my favorite."
"Ryan, I'm not sure I agree with you, don't forget the innovative techno-socks, where our
rappeller's socks were enclosed in what looked like regular plastic bags. Now that's ready to wear, easy to obtain from any household kitchen. And remember dry feet are the key to avoiding blisters, fungus and other maladies."
"All true but I consider that a 'fashion Fall-pax' and anyway that was just an accessory, this is the real deal. Have you compared the relationship between the mid-length beard and the mid-leg length of his trench coat? This coat is totally ready-to-wear! Did you recognize the aerodynamics to the break in the cuff of his pants? This man looks like he really enjoys what he is wearing! He is totally dressed to thrill!
"And who could forget the shoes, tough rugged leather, the right size heel and a no-slip tread that not only works on well-polished department store floors but would certainly put Timberland to shame? Notice his finesse doing the three step back, three step forward maneuver, reminiscent of the Shemona Esray prayer or the Penguin Shuffle as we backseat temple goers call it."
"Truly dressed to rappel, the only question remains, "Repel what?"
"Well, look how time has gotten away from us. So as the bunny once said, "That's all, folks!""
"Keep an eye out (not literally) for our next episode where our model discovers that money doesn't grow on trees..."
"This has been your host Ryan, and I am out!"
"It's about time, and til next time, I'm Ty!"
"And my name is Ty! We will be your guides on today's episode of Wilderness Walkway where you get to share our lives living on the edge...of the cliff and sanity! Look Ryan, the veils of morning hazes are parting as we speak, almost in a manner reminiscent of the fabled Red Sea parting."
"Yes, and here comes our first model. Notice his confident, Moses-like stride, as if it is his God-given right to mark this territory. And oh what a mark that would be! Look how well he is selling that outfit. Don't you feel like you just want to run out and buy one?"
"Well, Ryan. I don't think just anyone could get away with that look, it takes a strong personality, poise, confidence, and a great sense of laisse-faire to pull off that look. But my, wouldn't you just love to believe you could?"
"Indeed, Ty, I would. That outfit just screams, "Get out there into the wilderness, into the desert where our forefathers tread; out there, where time seems to stand still and the mystery of the universe is as dark as the coat he is wearing."
"God, Ryan, I wish I knew where you come up with this stuff."
"Ty, here's my shameless plug for Allie, the 'Shiksa with style.' She's my number one go-to for all that is fashion, and, by golly, isn't everything about fashion?"
"True but here this outfit is telling a story. It's the time-old story about conquering your yatzer hara (evil inclination, for all you devil wanna be's) and being prepared for anything. Just look closely at his outfit. Let's begin with the skullcap which keeps his head warm on a brisk fall day, allowing him to enjoy the rich vibrant colors of the fall foliage. It has a fine velvety surface for a pleasurable sensory experience, yet the inner layer is a synthetic design to wick away perspiration under the most extreme conditions.
"Notice his long black coat, definitely appropriate for the season and you really can never go wrong with a wide selection of black. This man has the two essential qualities you would want, style and practicality. Like his multifaceted mind, he has layers. His clothing layers allow him to add or subtract as the weather demands..."
"Er, Ty, have you ever seem him subtract any layers even in the summer?'
"Ryan, you are forgetting that temperature at elevation and in the wilderness can drop quite suddenly even in the summer. I think what you are seeing is a fully prepared wilderness wanderer. Think 40 years of wandering capability built into that outfit."
"I tell you, Ty, I've been thinking about all the great outfits we have seen so far this season here in the great outdoors but this one certainly is my favorite."
"Ryan, I'm not sure I agree with you, don't forget the innovative techno-socks, where our
rappeller's socks were enclosed in what looked like regular plastic bags. Now that's ready to wear, easy to obtain from any household kitchen. And remember dry feet are the key to avoiding blisters, fungus and other maladies.""All true but I consider that a 'fashion Fall-pax' and anyway that was just an accessory, this is the real deal. Have you compared the relationship between the mid-length beard and the mid-leg length of his trench coat? This coat is totally ready-to-wear! Did you recognize the aerodynamics to the break in the cuff of his pants? This man looks like he really enjoys what he is wearing! He is totally dressed to thrill!
"And who could forget the shoes, tough rugged leather, the right size heel and a no-slip tread that not only works on well-polished department store floors but would certainly put Timberland to shame? Notice his finesse doing the three step back, three step forward maneuver, reminiscent of the Shemona Esray prayer or the Penguin Shuffle as we backseat temple goers call it."
"Truly dressed to rappel, the only question remains, "Repel what?"
"Well, look how time has gotten away from us. So as the bunny once said, "That's all, folks!""
"Keep an eye out (not literally) for our next episode where our model discovers that money doesn't grow on trees..."
"This has been your host Ryan, and I am out!"
"It's about time, and til next time, I'm Ty!"
